What motivates you? Is it external or internal? Motivation is key to changing our lives and yet many of us never understand what motivates us. We know what lack of motivation looks like: not losing weight, not exercising, or not doing that project we’ve been putting off. The important question to ask is what does motivation look like and how do you get it?

For me, my motivation would last until my Abusive Brain Chatter would unhelpfully remind me that I was “not good enough or strong enough” to reach that goal. Then the motivation turned in to “why try?” What I learned is that I must stay out of my head when I set a goal, and that I need support and accountability if I am to reach it.

I like to think of myself as a person of her word, so if I make a commitment, I am apt to be more motivated to achieve that goal. And, if I know the root of the motivation it makes more sense for me — and I will stay motivated.

Working out is challenging for me, so I must make commitments around exercise. That means paying for my Pilates classes a month in advance or signing up and paying for classes. During the pandemic, I stopped exercising. I am not good at motivating myself to exercise alone, so I hired a trainer to hold me accountable to work out in my home (wearing masks). It was the only way I could stay motivated, and since exercise is important to my health (that’s my motivation), I knew I had to figure out a way to stay accountable. There is science to back up the claim that we get a dopamine hit when we achieve a goal, so I make sure my goals are small enough to reach. That keeps me enthused to keep going. I have a sheet of gold stars I sometimes give myself after I complete a step.

I am currently writing my book on Healing Abusive Brain Chatter and I find that my own chatter and the magnitude of that project can hold me back from writing, so I even though I am a Life Coach, I hired a Life Coach to help me break down my weekly goals into small achievable steps (Rule number one in coaching is practice what you preach). Many coaching schools need practice clients so if you don’t have money to pay for a coach, put yourself on a list for FREE coaching.

The lesson here is that if you’re having trouble staying motivated, pick one small goal this week and ask yourself why you want to achieve this goal? Why is this important to you? How will you feel when you reach it? How can you stay accountable? Believe it or not there are apps that help you reach your goals by charging you money when you don’t. Crazy huh? But if money motivates you then why not?

If you would like to stay motivated, please join me the first Monday of the month, at 5:30 PM PST on Zoom, for a FREE workshop to help you set and keep your goals.

Special bonus– as my way to keep you motivated, if you join me this Monday on Zoom, I will be offering a FREE follow-up accountability workshop in two weeks, to help you reclaim your motivation. This is ONLY for those who attend FREE on Monday, November 7 at 5:30 PM PST. Zoom room is 867206502 password is Butterfly. Please RSVP.